mouth full

what's up world? it's me, again, still listening to kanye's 808's and heartbreaks! i think i'm becoming weary a little bit. it's like i'm actually tired of being me. it's like i just wanna be my complete opposite for a day just to see what would happen but i can't man, i know i would say and do some outrageous things like never before... and i think i'm getting writer's block. i'm having a hard time coming up with lyrics and developing my stories. to be honest it might be that i spend so much time sleeping and when i do get up i don't really want to do anything. i haven't been reading a lot of imaginative literature in the last year either so that could be part of the problem that i can actually work on. as far as the music thing goes, i can write some dope stuff but i'm not the best at delivering it so i'm thinking about taking a serious time out on it until i feel better about it. i've been working on my delivery for a while, and while i've made some improvement i just feel like it's still not to the level i would like it to be. then there's the whole girlfriend issue... one day my good griend g asked me when i was gonna get a girlfriend and i told her that i wouldn't tell her when i did because she was over protective. then laura asked when me and g was getting married and kept telling laura g goes with her cousin because she does... and on top of that i haven't like g beyond the realm of being friends for a looooonnnnng time now. then the next day i went to my brother's house and he asked me what type of girls i liked because he was going to find me a girlfriend and a job because he wasn't going to pay for all my dates. so i'm glad (and amused) i got worried loved one but i've never really needed a girlfriend to feel like a normal guy. right now i'm just looking for cool females i could chill with on a non sexual vibe. someone that's willing to meet me half way in whatever type of friendship/relationship no matter what we choose to do. i gotta admit i've been thinking about a girlfriend every since the sundae situaiton came up last year. i don't even know what that was, but it was fun, it was intense, it was like having the best appetizer possible but there was no main course or desert... exactly!!! safe to say we're good friends but i still think about her sometimes... found out later she like me way more than i thought she did... (raises the roof) go me, go me!!! but now i'm chatting with an old friend on and off and she's just cool peeps and to be honest, i should have went to prom with her but the almighty, mr. confidence him self, was actually afraid to ask her. even a mutual friend of ours was like , "DOUG, YOU SHOULD REALLY ASK HER TO PROM... STOP BEING SILLY" and she gave me the wink like the feeling would be mutual but i just froze up. she looked great too, now that i think about it. we even had a moment junior year where i got her number but i never called. hmmm, second chance won't be blown *looks over imaginary shades, then pushes them back up with a sinister grin* ya feel me? but in all seriousness i'm looking forward to whatever happens between me and whoever because being young has it advantages.... ladies, think about it... being young has it's advantages doesn't it? stamina is a funny thing, i have tons of it and i'm not selfish at all... mind over matter right? i would make a great jedi if that world were real, that's all i gotta say!!! no it's not, one more thing... ima James, and even though i fight the bad habbits that are coded into my genes, i'm coming out my cage in june and july because that's when i'll be doing most of my travelling... i will take full responsibility for all of my actions but that doesn't mean i won't be as horrible as the GGC founding father that i am... enough, enough... yall will see in about two weeks... holler at me world, face book me douglas inkwell james... http://www.myspace.com/biggerd07 ... tweeting is stupid to me, if you need something dope written i write academic stuff, fiction, and i tailor non fiction, as well as song lyrics... i'm bored right now and i wanna write some more but i gotta dip out for a minute so i might be back beforei doze off. holler at me world